Don sits perched on his bed with a scowl. I’m guessing I’m a little too late on the gate this morning at 8:30 a.m. I had another night with very little sleep. He’s lucky it’s not later. I stand in the doorway waiting for an onslaught of complaints. Nothing. Still scowling.
Kristy: What’s wrong?
Don: I’m waiting for dinner?
Kristy: It’s 8:30 in the morning. Do you mean you are waiting for breakfast?
Don: Really? I guess I am messed up.
Kristy: No argument there. That’s why you need to listen to the rest of us. We know better than you do because your brain isn’t thinking correctly.
Don: I need to leave and go to the other house.
Kristy: See, that’s exactly what I mean. There is no other house. You have heard that from everybody. Are we all wrong?
Don: Usually.
Kristy: I have just enough milk for a bowl of cereal or oatmeal. Which do you prefer?
Don: I thought it was dinnertime.
Kristy: I’m ready for breakfast. It makes it easier for me if you eat at the same time I do. Then I don’t have to fix 3 extra meals.
Don: There’s people to wait on me. They can do it.
Kristy: See, again, that’s not correct. This is not a 24/7 facility. Do you want to go back and live in a full-time nursing facility? I can call Asher and see what’s available.
Don: Not really.
Kristy: That’s good because, contrary to what you have been told, you need to pay for that kind of care, and it’s very expensive. Plus, there is only 1 such facility in our area and they have a waiting list.
Don: Can I get some coffee?
Kristy: OK. Cereal or oatmeal?
Don: I need to quit watching the Olympics.
Kristy: Another week, give or take, and it’s done. Why would you quit watching now?
Don: Because I need to GO to the Olympics.
Kristy: The Olympics in Paris?
Don: Yeah, I’m part of the team.
Kristy: Which team, which sport?
Don: I’m an alternate.
Kristy: Which sport?
Don: That’s what I gotta figure out.
Kristy: Have you seen very many people over the age 70 on TV that are competing in the current Olympics?
Don: No, I guess not.
Kristy: Why would any team, for any sport, want a handicapped 73-year-old man on their Olympic team?
Don: Because I’m really good.
Kristy: Wait a minute, wait a minute, hold up. Really good at what? Like a coach?
Don: Yeah, maybe.
Kristy: You know you need to go to Paris, but you don’t know what sport or where to report for competition? Is that correct?
Don: I will find out when I see myself on TV.
Kristy: Cereal and coffee coming right up.
Team Unidentified Sports Association (USA)! That must be part of Special Olympics? Yep, that’s my boy – SPECIAL – with one good arm and 2 good legs. Other parts are questionable.
Note to Self: Bah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha (breath) ha!