An elder to Sasquatch has been living in my home for about 6 months. I say elder because the fur is white. I think a male human is still living in there somewhere. Time to find out.
Don has dismantled all equipment, at home, that was even remotely eligible for hair cutting, mustache trimming or facial shaving. That’s not even considering hair growing from the nostrils, every inch of the ears, or eyebrows that have a life of their own. I raised girls; and I know nothing about such tools or procedures for boys. Therefore, a trip to the barbershop is now mandatory because no one has stepped up to help, although some made promises. We try 4 different options. One barber is leaving as we walk in the door, another is by appointment only, #3 is booked 2 weeks out and the last one is out of business.
A friend recommended a beautician in a small shop close to home. We will call this beautician Kelly. When we walked into the shop, I noticed someone had a 3-6-month-old child in a car seat on the floor near a beautician station. Like mother and auntie elephants, adult women started surrounding the infant. I guess I would, too, if such a 2-legged hairy creature entered my beauty shop looking like it might growl and bare teeth at any moment. Of course, Don was clueless. Don and Kelly chit-chat about what’s needed, and the fur flies. A man eventually emerges from the beautician chair.
We thank Kelly for her Sasquatch services and we decide on a Mexican lunch afterwards, complete with beer for Don and a champagne margarita for me. The first sip of beer and Don’s eyes rolled back in his head with pure pleasure. After ordering our food and more pleasurable sips of beer, we had a brief conversation about the upcoming NFL season. Then there is an abrupt change of subject.
Don: Where do you think Kelly’s husband slept last night?
Kristy: I don’t know if Kelly is even married, let alone where her spouse sleeps.
Don: Well, he was supposed to sleep under me last night. When I woke up this morning, he was gone. Did you see him?
Kristy: Oooh, yeah, that husband. He came down to my room and said he’s never going upstairs to your room again.
No further discussion and we enjoyed the rest of our lunch.
Note to Self: Today was a very good day.