Clowns 2 and 3 decide to have a seafood fest with their friends and use my kitchen for cleaning, prep, seasoning and cooking. They ask for an oyster knife. “A what? I don’t even know what that is.” I was given an explanation/definition that it is a small tool needed to open oysters. Also referred to as an oyster shucker. Still not helping.
I drag out all the crab cracking tools I can find, including miniature forks and one item that looks like some kind of war doctor torture tool. I am told that’s not what they are looking for. I open all the kitchen drawers where any such tools could possibly be hiding; and tell them to feel free to use any tool they need. I don’t cook; I don’t want to cook and I hate grocery shopping so I can cook.
Note to Self: Maybe I should have opened the junk drawer? I know there are some pretty useful tools in there. A standard screwdriver looked like a good candidate to me.